Tag Archives: hate

The Fringes

We have always been taught that human actions have clear definitions. If your actions are not good then they are bad. If you are not telling the truth then you’re lying. If you are not sleeping then you are awake. If you are not present then you are undoubtedly absent.

We have been raised to think that if you dont love the you hate. That if you are not wise,it is because you are foolish. That you can either be dumb or intelligent but not both. The ultimate is that things are either black or white.

But what of the gray areas, the watershed regions where things are not so clear. The actions you can call neither good nor bad, the curcumstances that you can neither lie nor say the truth. Tell me, the teenage girl that told her attacker she is menstruating so that she can avoid being raped, did she lie? Or the drunkard that staggers on the street and dishes out unsolicited but cogent advise to those he passes, is he foolish?

There are times when we are neither awake nor asleep, there are people and situations we neither love nor hate. There are those who are acclaimed as intellectuals but when they talk on certain issues, you wonder if they had a lobotomy. Even in life, there are those that are not dead but they are not alive either.

Strict definitions and demarcations do not always work for all things. But the more important thing is who draws the line on these definitions? Is it time that defines our actions, is it the audience or is it you the doer ? Sometimes to make a valid point we must work on the fringes of black and white. And its not wrong to do so.

The truth about lies

We have all lied at one time or the other be it small or big, white or dark, moral or immoral or whatever classification you choose to use. The ability to lie is one that is common to us all.

We lie because we are afraid

We lie because we feel insecure

We lie because we want to appear cool

We lie because we want to appear more than we really are

We lie because we don’t trust others

We lie because we believe others can’t keep our “secrets”

We lie because we love

We lie because we want to cause harm

We lie because sometimes we think we can’t help it

We lie to score points with friends

We lie to win arguments

We lie to appear to know more than we actually do

We lie so that people don’t see our failings or disappointments

We lie in an attempt to make amends

We lie to reduce pain

We lie to get people interested in us

We lie to cover up our shame

We lie to get better bargains or deals

We lie to be considered before others

We lie to protect our loved ones

We lie to punish our enemies

We lie because sometimes its hard to imagine a world where nobody lies

We lie to keep up appearances

We lie to get our way when we think we need an edge

We lie to escape punishment or sanction

We lie not because the devil made us do it

We lie because we choose to

Most importantly we lie so we can feel good with ourselves.

Whats the point of all this? To detect the root of our lies and yank it out, so we can be a bit more honest today than yesterday.